9 Surprising Mistakes People Make to Achieve Total Happiness
When people paralyze their minds to avoid sadness and suffering, they are also paralyzing their minds for joy, gratitude, and happiness,” University of Houston Professor Brené Brown said at TED, where he gave a variety of presentations. Habits that are commonly said to be “the things we should incorporate into our daily lives to be happy” may actually be hurting ourselves rather than making us happy in the long run. ……, which is wrong for long-term and total happiness. The Third Metric summarizes nine things that may be wrong with your long-term and overall happiness.
The 9 Happiness Mistakes You’re Probably Making
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/10/14/happiness-mistakes_n_4080099.html
◆1: You place too much emphasis on achieving
Focusing too much on achieving happiness can lead you away from it. This is evidenced by research from the University of Denver, which found that people who feel pressured to be happy are more likely to feel lonely on a daily basis than those who do not. This is because pressure causes stress, which has an impact on happiness and health.
◆2: Be positive to the point of exhaustion
While it is important to focus on the bright side, there are always pitfalls in life. Even if you should maintain a positive disposition, striving to do so can hurt you. For better or worse, crying is an emotional response to external triggers. Both mental and physical health are important to human beings, but repressing emotions can put them at risk. Sometimes it is necessary to abandon positivity.
◆3: Oversharing
Happiness becomes real when we share it with others,” said Christopher McCandless, but in these days of digitalization, it’s a little different. Research from the University of Kansas and the University of Birmingham has shown that oversharing on social networking sites such as Facebook, even if it is a happy post, can cause discord in romantic relationships, with one lover posting a photo of the other when they are not together and a good friend posting a photo of a friend who is not with him or her. When one lover uploads photos of the other when they are not together, or when a good friend uploads photos with a friend other than themselves, the trust between the two is damaged, according to the study. Be careful not to share too much information with someone and yourself, as it makes your relationship with the rest of the world less special.
◆4: Touching your smartphone or Facebook at any time
Connecting with others is key to happiness, but when it’s over Facebook, you may be hurting. A University of Michigan study shows that Facebook and social networking use decreases positivity and happiness. According to the study, people who spent more time on Facebook were more exhausted, and users who spent the most time on their news feeds had the least satisfaction with their lives. Constantly being connected to someone else is a distraction from your well-being. You can also miss important moments in your life because you are spending so much time on your smartphone. If you don’t turn off your smartphone, you may be setting yourself up for a cycle of lost contentment and productivity.
◆5: Trying to get everything done
You may think that doing it all-work, social activities, errands, school activities, etc.-is accomplishment. In reality, however, it is quite the opposite of accomplishment. Trying to do it all can quickly dampen a happy mood. This is especially true for women, according to a study published in 2011, which found that women who tried to be “super moms” put more pressure on themselves and were at higher risk of depression, while women who had a realistic vision of work-family balance had a much higher sense of happiness. Commenting on this, Debora Spar, principal of Barnard College, said, “You can’t do everything. You can’t do everything, but you can do the things that matter to you.
◆6: Not remembering the past
Spending all your time thinking about the past is not the key to happiness, but reminiscing about the past should point you in the right direction. A 2012 study on nostalgia and emotion found that when people dwell on the past, they experience a strong sense of physiological comfort. Heartwarming memories help people relate past experiences to the present. Nostalgia warms you physically and makes you happy.
◆7: Not moving
It is no secret that a healthy life, both mentally and physically, creates happiness. But the reality is that few people actually practice it. Walking makes you mindful, boosts your creativity, and helps you produce vitamins. Get your feet moving, release some endorphins, and enjoy a little happiness.
◆8: Resist change
When your career and current environment are just the way you want them to be, you may wish your perfect life would never change. But being hesitant about change can lead to unhappiness. According to psychological research on choice, the human brain innately tries to avoid loss, but resisting loss creates stress. Just because you are happy with your life now is no reason to resist change. Whether it is fear of the unknown or fear of losing what you have, taking on pressure now can undermine your satisfaction with your future life.
◆9: Not being mindful
Numerous studies exist on the connection between meditation and happiness; UCLA research shows that setting aside time for mindfulness increases positive mood and makes you brighter. Physically, practicing meditation rewires your brain, increases your mental intelligence, and speeds up your memory of information. Mindfulness meditation practices relax your body, cultivate your readiness for gratitude, and lower your stress levels-essential elements for maintaining well-being.